matchmakinginlagos

ALLIBABA’S TAKE ON SHODDY REASONS WHY PEOPLE DATE

Veteran comedian Alibaba has a message for women who think men are a financial plan and men who share the same thoughts.

Read below and share your thoughts:

This is what I should have sent to that extremely pretty lady I met in a Governor’s Lodge, in Abuja in 2009. When I say she was a beauty… I mean finer than Bianca OJUKWU. And as we got gisting and waited for Our Excellency to attend to us, she revealed that she had a 2.1 in Microbiology.

At the time, I was a brand ambassador for Chivita (Hollandia). So I asked if she would like to work with Chivita. So I could call Mr BERI. She stood up and said “Why would I go and work with this kind of body?”

I then asked why she studied so hard to make 2.1 and end up not wanting to work. She said “Bros, if them tell you say I study, so you go believe?”… she then dropped the bomb. She is not looking for a job. She is looking for a rich boy from a wealthy home, marry him, have kids, and if he misbehaves… “he go settle me and i go just waka”.

I am bringing this up now, because after her, in the last 6 years, I have met Many young ladies with that mind set. The underlying philosophy with this mindset is that the lady believes a guy holds the key to all her aspirations.

Sadly, some guys think like that too. This kind of thinking is why some ladies can not leave abusive relationships. They would rather bear the inhuman treatment than to be free of the abuse and face life on their own.

RELATIONSHIP CHECKLIST

The whole essence of our relationships is to find someone that can complement us, make us better and above all walk with us to a mutual destination. This week we have come up with 70 questions you need to ask yourself before saying yes to that person and if you have, it’s time to start keeping tabs on these little things. 70? Yes, 70! It will be divided into two editions, so you can’t afford to miss the next edition.

Few weeks ago I spoke to a lady who wanted to know if the current dude she was dating is the right person. The question sounded so vague and I had to pause for a few moments before responding to her. My response wasn’t an answer like she would have desired but a series of unending questions.

Similarly, there are lots of folks who have this same question on their minds; so I decided to list a few (maybe not few) questions you should ask yourself when in doubt about that relationship you’re in. There are really no right or wrong answers to these questions but then you’ll know certainly if you are in the right relationship or not after genuinely answering these questions.

1.    Has your partner discovered his/her purpose; what is your partner passionate about? No, I’m not asking if he has a job!

2.    Is your partner encouraging and supportive of what you want in life?

3.    Does your partner have a mentor; an authority figure who (s) he’s submitted to?

4.    Does she respect you?

5.    Do you feel safe around him?

6.    Are you being your authentic self around your partner?

7.    Can I express myself freely when difficult situations come up?

8.    Is he genuinely happy for me when good things happen to me?

9.    Has he ever raised his hand and threatened me?

10.    Does (s)he respect her parents and older siblings?

11.    What was your first impression about your partner?

12.    What did you like or love about your partner?

13.    Do you still like what you loved about your partner and why?

14.    Are you happy with the intimacy you share?

15.    Are you in the relationship because you’re desperate to get married?

16.    Do you feel the same the way you felt for your partner at the beginning of the relationship?

17.    Are you positively affecting each other’s life?

18.    Are you having fun with your partner?

19.    Do I like who I am when I’m with and without him?

20.    Do I feel uplifted or drained when we’re together?

21.    Can I live with his quirky behaviors and traits?

22.    Do I like him the way he is if he never changes?

23.    Do you share similar core values with your partner?

24.    Do you share similar religious views?

25.    Do you respect each other’s beliefs?

26.    What new things have you gotten involved in because of your partner’s influence?

27.    Ladies; does he make you cry too often that you probably don’t remember times you laughed together

28.    Do you like spending time with your partner’s friends and family?

29.    Do my family and friends like my partner?

30.    Do I like my partner’s family and friends?

TO BE CONTINUED- By Motolani Olanipekun

101WAYS TO EXPRESS LOVE TO YOUR PARTNER

101WAYS TO EXPRESS LOVE TO YOUR PARTNER

Its possible to get stranded sometimes when it comes to what to do to show how much you care. Probably because you don’t know what your partner really want, or you just cant say if you are doing it the right way. It is the desire of every human to feel loved and appreciated, and when you show love the right way, it has a way of making your partner glow.
Follow these 100 tips on what you can do to show love to your partner:

show-the-love-2
1. Hug them.

2. Write a love note.

3. Call them at work just to say “Hi.”

4. Give them a foot massage.

5. Tell them a joke.

6. Caress them with slow gentle strokes.

7. Go for a walk with them.

8. Send them a “happy gram.”

9. Admit your mistakes.

10. Say: “I love you.”

11. Indulge a whim.

12. Listen to them talk about an interest of theirs.

13. Be trustworthy.

14. Instead of complaining, tell them what you would prefer.

15. Look at them when you’re in a discussion.

16. Send flowers.

17. Compliment something they did.

18. Offer to help.

19. Ask them to show you how to do something.

20. Call when you are going to be late.

21. Take them out to dinner.

22. Write them a poem about how special they are.

23. Cut out a cartoon they’ll enjoy.

24. Ask them what they’d like sexually.

25. Go shopping together.

26. Take an afternoon drive.

27. Cuddle.

28. Put your arm around them in front of others.

29. Take them out on a surprise date.

30. Do something they want to do.

31. Listen.

32. Plan a candle light dinner.

33. Look at old photos together.

34. Serve them breakfast in bed.

35. Hold hands.

36. Share sexual fantasies.

37. Do a work project together.

38. Rub their back.

39. Take a shower together.

40. Carry their photo in your wallet.

41. Go away together for a weekend holiday.

42. Kiss them.

43. Smile more when you look at them.

44. Go for a bicycle ride together.

45. Surprise them with “special” attire.

46. Plan a picnic lunch.

47. Read something together about how to have a better relationship.

48. Repeat what they say before answering.

49. Say “Good morning” first.

50. Ask if they have a few minutes first before interrupting.

51. Send them a card.

52. Surprise them with a gift when it’s a non-holiday.

53. Cook them a favorite meal.

54. Try a new restaurant.

55. Ask them how they feel.

56. Let them know when you are proud of them.

57. Ask for their opinion.

58. Turn on some romantic music.

59. Dedicate a song to them.

60. Send them a balloon bouquet.

61. Watch a sunset together.

62. Play a game together.

63. Have them teach you something they know.

64. Go to a movie they select.

65. Ask them for a hug.

66. Wear some new cologne.

67. Take them to Bali.

68. Discuss future plans with them.

69. Ask if you can help when they look sad.

70. Ask them about their dreams.

71. Meet them for lunch.

72. Enlarge a scenic photo of a place you’ve shared.

73. Give them a gift certificate for their favorite store.

74. Tell them what you like about them.

75. Buy them a new perfume.

76. Take them to a scenic spot.

77. Send them a gourmet gift basket.

78. Send them a joke card.

79. Let them know when you’ve thought of them during the day.

80. Compliment them to their friends.

81. Bring them a thirst quenching drink.

82. Tell them when they look attractive.

83. Send them a post card.

84. Invite them to a secret rendezvous.

85. Give them a massage.

86. Take a lesson with them.

87. Look at photos together of when you met.

88. Plan a vacation with them.

89. Listen openly to their opposing opinion.

90. Buy them a new piece of jewelry.

91. Watch a TV show they like with them

92. Write them a letter.

93. Listen to music with them, such as an old favorite.

94. Whisper sweet nothings in their ear.

95. Tell them what you like that they do.

96. Give a head massage.

97.Invite them to a concert.

98. Go dancing together e.g salsa class

99. Go sporting together

100. Go to movies together

101. Stroke their palms

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